Somali born supermodel, businesswoman and philanthropist, Iman was recently in SA to launch her cosmetics range. A friend who was at the launch reported that Iman made an interesting declaration, that “when women feel good they do good”.
The aim of The Goddess Academy is to support and inspire women’s pursuit of pleasure, passion and purpose. Many people would prefer it to be issues based, to be about helping women resolve or cope with their problems, like therapy or support groups. The pursuit of pleasure seems too frivolous for them. I, unfortunately, discourage focusing on problems, because where attention goes energy flows and where energy flows stuff grows – see Universal Law of Attraction. Consequently many women who inquire about the academy’s offerings find themselves in a conundrum. I expect them to invest time, money and commitment to what seems a flimsy pursuit when their lives have demanding partners, expectant kids, ailing parents, unfortunate relatives and other noble responsibilities. What I am asking of them appears reckless, selfish, even morally reprehensible. What they do not realise is what Iman has observed, that women are at their best when they feel best.
I find myself constantly making the case for pleasure. I’ve previously written on why pleasure is essential to good physical and emotional health. Our society endorses doing good over feeling good, and the most sanctioned route to feeling good is through doing good. A high from spending the day at an orphanage socially trumps one acquired from a day at the spa. Doing good feels good, irrespective of gender, but it is generally not the best starting point for women. Women and men are wired differently. When women pursue good feelings through good deeds they often end up burnt out or resentful. Incidentally, women are twice as likely as men to suffer from depression.
There is an ebook by Sam Geppi called Stellar Relationships which explains this phenomenon based on vedic astrology and the four elements. It explores the effects of the masculine elements of fire and air, and the feminine elements of earth and water on the emotional nature of men and women. Sam Geppi explains that; “in general, when women feel good about themselves they will do good. Feelings precede actions…when men do good things, they feel good about themselves. Actions precede feelings.” This is worth repeating. Men use actions to feel good. Women need to feel good in order to do good. (If you are interested in the finer details you can download the ebook).
A man who cannot do good, for example protect and provide for his loved ones will feel miserable and emasculated. On the other hand a woman who feels good; say she is in love, is feeling appreciated or beautiful, will be inclined towards actions which will spread the joy.
For too long women have been pursuing emotional fulfilment in a masculine way, starting with actions instead of feelings. Through cultivating pleasure a woman will discover her passions. Her passions will lead her to her purpose and provide the impetus to fulfil that purpose, and purpose is always about service. Nothing can be further from selfishness and frivolity.